Why do people have to be so damn ugly?  I get it, I am not the only person to see a shift in mannerisms and customs.  Additionally, I have been an ardent activist and supporter of individual and social change – so I am a party to the changes taking place in the structure and  relations of our society.  I am certainly NOT at all interested in harkening back to some other time because I am not a believer of the ‘good ole days,’ coz they weren’t so good!  I do not believe that words alone hurt, but I do think that actions do cause harm.  I have worked very hard to live as a ‘conscience’ person and I generally try to think through my actions.  I am a smarty pants and do think very quickly on my feet, I know this is a talent that not all humans share with me, so I also try to exercise patience, even as I also know that I am not always successful at that.

But freakin’ bloody hell!  Why people gotta be so damn ugly?  There is a general transition occurring in my generation that converts the idea of “all in all” into an extreme selfishness and hostility towards others.  I’m the first to admit to losing my mind while in traffic and most of the time I try to keep the cursing to decibels heard only inside the car, but I never go out of my way to be an outright ass on the road.  I do not live in a community that shares my same values.  I did not think I came from such a generous or considerate community prior to living here, but I can see now that there was some sense of respect-for-self-and-others dynamic going on.  It is not just in the car either.  I think the car is a daily reminder of the individualistic experience – wherein the ideology that being the only person in the car and not knowing personally any of the other drivers on the road thereby entitles one to a sense of self-importance and rule-defiance.  This is particularly true on the roads in the city where I live, but it is also true on the internet where one’s ‘true’ identity (in the non-foccault-sense) is unknown to most and therefore one can say and do whatever they want without any real fear of retribution.

Unfortunately, this ‘all-in-all’ way of being in the world is contagious.  It has a way of leaking out into the dailiness of interpersonal relations.  Most people do not engage with others in a positive manner, even when they know they should.  The suspicion and distrust are palpable when one meets new people and the efforts to avoid putting one’s ‘real’ self out there for others to judge is too much.  And that is just it, isn’t it?  We’ve become peopled by JudgeJudies without having to take any personal responsibility for our actions.  The 70’s feminist movement’s motto of the personal being political has largely been effective in that no person has the reliance of privacy without some possibility of public consequence.  That is both a good and bad thing.  Leaders are being called on the carpet for acts that bely their moralistic personas; much like the John Edwards scandal of the last few weeks.  Even Britney Spears is suffering the ideological impact because her pop-stardom was precipitated by guile and innocence that she sold for big bucks long after it’s veracity had been strewn like clothes on the floor.  But the take-down has become titillating – and that is the rub.

How do we live in a society that makes atrocities transparent and affords the community opportunities to advance solutions to those ills without exacerbating the slowdowntowatchthecarwreck proclivities of the human race?… because we all watch others burnout or fadeout for a myriad of psychological reasons.

a bitchin feminista mama at the intersection of political quagmire and real life.

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